


Mine

by DudaMonteiro



Series: Mine [1]
Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: F/M, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:21:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28352361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DudaMonteiro/pseuds/DudaMonteiro
Summary: For Maya, falling in love was like stepping into a black hole. In both situations, you would be completely sucked in and would no longer exist as a person.But luckily for the girl, Reggie showed her that there is another way. That love doesn’t always have to be destructive.And because of that, she couldn’t regret choosing to enter the black hole.
Relationships: Reggie Peters & Original Character(s), Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Mine [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2076321
Comments: 3
Kudos: 4





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, so, this story will have at least six parts plus the ending. I will try not to take too long between one part and another.  
> It's slightly based on Mine by Taylor Swift.  
> One thing you need to know is that this is my first time writing in English. So any mistakes you find, please tell me. I’ve reread it a billion times, but I’m just a person who’s learning to write English by force.  
> Thank you and I hope you like it!

No matter how much time passed, he would always surprise her. Maya should be used to this by now. Yet, she knew it would never happen. Reggie would always find a way to do that.

Anyone who didn’t know he would never believe that that’s silly, goofy boy had already graduated from high school. And I was taking some classes at the public college in the city while working part-time as a waiter. And on top of that, he still managed to find time to shine in a rock band with his best friends. A band that grew exponentially. All this without losing the good mood and the feeling of comfort.

From the beginning of the band, Maya knew that no matter how big the city was, it would soon be too small for her boys. And they would leave without looking back. This was one of the few things she was sure of. It was a matter of time.

While the boys chased their dreams, for a long time, all Maya knew how to do was run from their feelings. Reggie didn’t know how to hide his feelings, but that was all Maya knew how to do. The fear of giving in and getting hurt was always greater than anything. At least that was what she had thought for a long time.

She had always wondered why people were willing to fall in love if, in the end, love would not last. And would only leave people hurt as a consequence.

Maya based her expectations on her parents’ relationship. When she and her siblings were small, their relationship seemed ideal, they never fought, they never disagreed. Only older than the girl came to understand that this was only because her mother always gave in, she always played the submissive. And that was what kept the couple together. It wasn’t the love they had for each other, heavens, Maya didn’t even know if at some point they came to really love each other. No, what kept them together was the woman’s dependence.

From an early age, Maya knew that this was not what she wanted for herself. So she preferred to stay away from relationships, thinking that this was the only way to not end up hostage to someone else.

And she would never be dependent on someone like that.

Yet, that didn’t stop her from falling in love.

Now she knew that not all relationships needed to be that way, the way she grew up thinking it was normal. And all thanks to him, Reggie.

Reggie, who conquered her slowly.

Reggie, who was once a friend.

Reggie…


	2. Everything Has Changed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For Maya, falling in love was like stepping into a black hole. In both situations you would be completely sucked in and would no longer exist as a person.  
> But luckily for the girl, Reggie showed her that there is another way. That love doesn’t always have to be destructive.  
> And because of that, she couldn’t regret choosing to enter the black hole.

**M** aya couldn't forget the first step she took towards the black hole.  
At the time, she did not imagine the danger she was in. And later on, knowing what would happen, Maya knew she should be sorry. But she couldn't…  
It was after another night of fights with her father. She couldn't take it anymore. She didn't even remember why they were fighting anymore.  
The reason was never important.  
The man just wanted to take all of his frustrations out on someone, and as Alex, his favorite target, was not at home, he was content with his youngest daughter.  
He had never been the most loving man in the world, always trying to control everyone and everything. Always acting as if he was the owner of reason. Always trying to own all aspects of children's lives. But his behavior became more violent when his two younger children came out to the family.  
Truth be told, the fights usually started with the offenses he addressed to Alex, who always ended up accepting quietly, not wanting to make any more confusion. However, Maya always defended her twin brother, which escalated the fights, but the girl had never been able to accept things easily.  
Since the older sisters left home to study abroad; which really was just an excuse to escape their parents; Alex and Maya had to deal with family problems alone. The discussions became almost daily, since the two older sisters, who served as mediators, were no longer there. It had been almost a year since Maya and Alex only had each other during these fights. The mother just accepted everything quietly, never doing anything.  
Maya knew that she didn't want that for herself. She would never be held hostage by anyone the way her mother was held hostage by her husband.  
The woman had remained at her husband's side, never reacting, even when he was angry after discovering that his only son was gay and his youngest daughter was bisexual. Not even the youngest children's expressions of fear made the woman react.  
Quite different from Maya, who was never able to keep silent about the offenses directed at her brother, no matter how much he begged her not to get involved: “It's not worth it”, was what he used to say. But it was worth it. Maya couldn't stand the way her father treated her brother, which is why she always got involved. It was at that time that the offenses started to address her. Even though the man believed that the girl's bisexuality was just a phase, he did not spare the offenses.  
The fights usually ended in the same way, with the siblings fleeing the house and seeking comfort elsewhere.  
At first, Maya always ended up at the home of one of her girlfriends. Until the “rumor” about her sexuality spread and the friends' parents started to refuse to receive her, always using some excuse.  
With nowhere to go, she ended up resorting to her brother and the places he ran away to, which was usually the garage in which his band rehearsed, or the home of a friend.  
Everything changed on one of the rare nights when Alex was not at home for the daily dose of humiliation, also known as dinner. He was on a date, but his parents believed that he was doing something for the school.  
Even without the main target of the offenses present, it did not stop the man and his hate speech. Without Alex to try to control her, and with a focus on her, Maya couldn't help herself. When she realized, she was already out of the house, with only her faithful backpack as a companion.  
With no place to go, her feet took her to the only place she could still see as a haven. She prayed that no one was there and that no one noticed her practically invading private property.  
She knew that the chance of the band being rehearsed was minimal, after all, they are without the drummer.  
In that part she was right.  
But the garage was not empty. Reggie was there.  
Sweet, and soon she found it, comforting Reggie.  
That was the first real interaction between the two. And it was something that the girl never got out of her head, no matter how hard she tried. And how she tried…  
That first day, she abruptly entered the garage, slamming the door shut, to discount her anger. Feeling trapped, she tossed her backpack next to the door, and only the absence of that weight made her breath better.  
Reggie almost fell off the couch with the girl's sudden and abrupt entry.  
Maya still took a few seconds to calm down, before understanding what had happened. She blushed slightly when she noticed that it was her arrival that had scared the boy.  
— Sorry, I didn't think there was anyone here.  
—Okay, — Reggie replied, rising from the floor. — What are you doing here? Alex is not coming today — he said, returning to sit on the sofa.  
— I know that. What are you doing here then? — she emphasized “you”. — I thought there would be no rehearsal today, — she said, slowly approaching the couch.  
— There isn’t. And I asked first!  
— And I asked second! — Maya replied, sitting in an armchair on the opposite side of what Reggie was.  
— So you answer first and I answer later, — argued the boy.  
Maya blew out a breath and put her feet on the coffee table. — We can stay in this all night, or ... you can just answer right away — she said, analyzing her nails as if it didn't matter, while in fact, she was just trying to think about what the next step would be.  
Reggie was silent for a few seconds, making Maya look at him. When he noticed, she smirked.  
— And? — she encouraged.  
— Things at home weren't very good, — was all Reggie said, shrugging and blushing slightly. Maya didn't know how to respond.  
— Ah ... — was all she managed to say.  
— I mean ... yeah, well, that's it. And you? Why are you here? Alex is not coming today — he reinforced.  
— I know. He told me about the date ... — She spent a few seconds in silence. —Things at home weren't very good either, — she confessed.  
— Ah, I thought it only happened when Alex was home, — Reggie blurted out, making Maya look at him, trying to understand how he knew that. — He told me about the fights, — he revealed, shrugging.  
— I should have known, — she mumbled slightly. — And yes, it's usually like that. But today...  
— I understand...  
The two were silent, watching the nothing.  
Maya was already sorry to have gone there. Because she now didn't know how to act. It was the first time that she was completely alone with Reggie. Of all the boys, he was the one she had the least intimacy with. She stood up, turning toward the door, to pick up her backpack.  
— Are you going? — He asked a little desperate, making the girl turn to look at him.  
— Yes. I didn't think there would be anyone here and I don't want to disturb you ...  
Reggie jumped up. — You're not disturbing me! — he spoke quickly. — I mean ... — he cleared his throat, trying to control the tone and speed of his voice. — I'm not doing anything. We may as well do nothing together.  
—We never spend time together, — she observed.  
—There's always a first time for everything — Reggie shrugged.  
— Okay ... — she didn't know how to answer but returned to sit in the armchair, much to the boy's relief.  
— No, seriously. You are always with Alex and the other boys. And yet, we never really talked — Reggie sat down on the couch too. They spent a few seconds in silence. — Do you want to talk about today? — He tried to start a conversation.  
Maya closed her eyes. — Only if you speak first.  
— But I asked first! — He complained, like a small child, pouting.  
— And I asked second! — Maya replied, imitating their first interaction.  
Reggie looked at her, trying to understand what was going on. It took a few seconds until an understanding was present on his face and he recognized what was happening. — All right, Miss Stubbornness. I begin.  
But despite saying it would start, he still spent a few more seconds in silence.  
— If you don't want to talk, you don't have to, Reg. I was just kidding, — Maya said softly, getting up from the chair and sitting next to the boy on the couch.  
— Not, it’s alright. That's not it ... I just don't know where to start.  
— I can speak first if you want.  
He looked at her, with a small smile on his face. — I thought you wanted me to start.  
Maya shrugged. — Someone has to start. Or we can stay in that eternal silence. Just tell me if that is the option, I would probably read it before going to sleep. Instead of knowing, stay in eternal boredom.  
The boy laughed, running a hand through his hair. When he stopped, he started to speak. — It's just that ... for a while now everything has changed. My parents started to fight more and more. They say it's just for financial reasons, but I know it isn't, — he said, shaking his head. — And now, with graduation coming ...  
— Ah, I forget that you and Bobby are already finishing school ... — she interrupted. — Sorry, you can continue.  
— Okay, — Reggie said gently, touching the girl's hand. — I even forgot what I was talking about.  
— About graduation coming up — Maya helped him.  
— Ah yes. That. With graduation coming they want me to leave the band and go to college. And get a job to help with household bills. This last part I understand, but ...  
—You don't want to go to college and leave the band, — she added.  
— I even think it might be cool to go to college. I don't know what I would do, but I think it would be cool. But quitting the band is not something I can do.  
— So don't do it. Go to college if you want. Get a job if you want. But just do what you want, Reggie.  
— I know I know. But it is sometimes not so easy — he rubbed one hand over his face, while the other was still intertwined with the girl. — Most of the time I can handle their fights. They do not usually involve us. But there are days ... some days it seems that fighting between them is not enough and they need someone else to blame ... Luckily it usually ends up being me, better than if it were Ben — he said, talking about his younger brother.  
Maya squeezed his hand, trying to give some comfort. — You are not responsible for their problems, Reggie. You know that, right?  
Reggie was crestfallen for a few seconds until he shook his head and smiled again. — I know, but thanks for listening to me. And now it's your turn — he recalled. Maya released the boy's hand and clasped her hands in her lap. — You don't have to talk if you don't want to ... — he said after seeing the girl's expression change.  
She sighed, taking the courage to speak. Maya had never been to reveal her feelings, but she felt she owed it to the boy.  
— I do not have much to say. Nothing new. Nothing that Alex probably hasn't already told you. My parents ... especially my father ... He, they can't accept us. And apparently, it doesn't matter what we do, there is nothing we can do to change that. And honestly, nowadays I don't even know if I want their love anymore. I just want a little respect, and not to be offended every day — she confessed.  
Now it was Reggie's turn to try to comfort her, putting an arm around the girl's shoulders, in a half hug.  
— Well, I don't know about your parents, but you can count on me whenever you need me. I promise not to offend and respect you — he said, making Maya smile.  
— Thank you — she thanked him sincerely.  
— I'm here for that — Reggie replied, without letting go and without thinking, gave a light kiss on her head. When he noticed what he did, he blushed and let go. — Sorry, — he said nervously, scratching the back of his neck.  
— Okay — Maya replied trying to hide the redness on her face. She looked around, trying to think of something to change the mood. — Yeah ... did Alex tell me that you like Star Wars?  
Reggie's face lit up, and they spent the rest of the night talking, even forgetting that they needed to sleep.  
And that was the first night of several that they connected, not only for their shared dramas but for several other different reasons.  
And soon the nights became afternoons, mornings, dawns ... the time did not matter and they were no longer just after family fights. They became the best friends they could ever imagine and want.  
But they both wanted more than that.

  
*

 **M** aya was lying on her bed. She was in that pre-nap state. After the sleepless night talking to Reggie, she still went to school. How she had managed to stay up all day was still a mystery to her.  
Seconds before she finally started her longed-for nap, the door to her room opened abruptly. She grunted and covered her face with a pillow. Praying that whoever entered her room would disappear.  
It didn't help much ...  
She soon felt a weight on her bed and the pillow was pulled off her face. — What's this about you spending the night with Reggie? — Her twin brother asked. Maya looked at him without understanding. — He said you guys spent the night in the garage.  
Maya straightens up on the bed, making room for him. She knew that the faster she answered Alex, the sooner she could sleep.  
— Long story short ... — she said in the middle of a yawn. — Another fight here, I ran away to the garage without knowing he was there, we spent the night talking, and that's it. Good night — she tried to take the pillow from her brother's hand, but it was in vain.  
— And since when do you spend the night talking with Reggie? — he asked, keeping the pillow away from the girl.  
— Since yesterday, apparently. Can I have my pillow back? — She asked angrily.  
Alex ignored her. — Are you two having something?  
Maya looked shocked. — What kind of question is that? Why do you think that? And shouldn't you be at the band's rehearsal?  
— It's the kind of question your older brother asks ...  
— Gosh, Alex. You're like, two minutes older, — she interrupted.  
— And the way Reggie talked about you, I definitely didn't like it! — Alex finished, still ignoring her. — And Reggie was practically sleeping on his feet, even though Luke insisted, there was no way for us to rehearse.  
Maya blushed slightly.  
— How did he talk about me?  
Alex looked at her in distress. — Please tell me you don't feel anything for Reginald — it made Maya blush even more. — Oh gosh! You feel something for Reginald!  
— I did not say anything! — she tried to defend herself.  
— But I can see it from your face! — He said getting up from the bed and starting to walk from side to side. Maya just watched. — Whatever it is, it has to stop!  
Maya raised her eyebrow. — Can you stop pacing?! It's making me dizzy! And what is the problem if, hypothetically speaking, I feel something for Reggie? It's not like he feels anything for me ... and anyway, it's not your business.  
Alex stopped walking to look at his sister. — Hypothetically, really?! Do you really think I believe that?  
She shrugged. — I still don't understand your concern.  
— My concern is that you are my little sister ...  
— For two minutes.  
— And Reggie is one of my best friends and bandmate. So if something happens between the two of you and it ends up going wrong, who will need to deal with the damage is me and the band.  
— Good heavens, Alex. Relax a little — with the look the boy gave her, she completed: — Okay, I know it's not easy to relax. But don’t worry. I have nothing with Reggie. We just became friends. Just like I am with Luke and Bobby, and you never freaked out about it.  
—I know, — he said, returning to sit on the girl’s bed. — And I know it's not really my business ... I just don't want to see either of you get hurt. And I know you and your hard head and total lack of tact for relationships.  
— Wow, thank you very much — the sarcasm was evident in the girl's voice. Alex looked at her as if he dared to disagree. — That's right. I have no tact for relationships. But you don't have to freak out about that! And if you want to, I stay away from Reggie. If that reassures your little head.  
Alex sighed. — Not, it’s alright. I will not meddle in this. Just be careful, please, — he said, hugging Maya and kissing her forehead.  
— Okay, I'll be careful...  
— And don't hurt Reggie!  
—I don't plan to, — she yawned and scratched her eyes. — Can I sleep now?  
—I'll think about your case, — he replied, standing up. — I'll call you for another wonderful dinner, — he said when reached the door.  
— Thank you so much, you don't have to. I'd rather die of hunger than face another dinner in this family.  
— Hahaha, very funny. Too bad you have no choice. Until dinner, — he said, closing the door.  
Maya sighed and closed her eyes, praying that she knew what she was getting into.


	3. Sparks Fly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For Maya, falling in love was like stepping into a black hole. In both situations, you would be completely sucked in and would no longer exist as a person.  
> But luckily for the girl, Reggie showed her that there is another way. That love doesn’t always have to be destructive.  
> And because of that, she couldn’t regret choosing to enter the black hole

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so ... is anyone here?

**A** s time went by, the friendship between Reggie and Maya only got stronger. And after yet another gigantic and unreasonable fight with her father, the girl fled to Reggie's house, as she had become accustomed to doing recently.

Despite all the fights his parents had, the boy tried to stay home most nights, for the sake of his little brother. And over time, Maya's presence in the house has become something habitual. She was always welcome in the residence, despite all the fights.

Reggie had already confided that his parents' fights used to subside (or at least become quieter) when the girl was there, as they tried to maintain the appearance of a perfect family.

Maya suspected that adults thought she and Reggie were dating. And it wouldn’t be she who would deny or confirm that information. Not if it was going to jeopardize Reggie's momentary peace and the safety of her little refuge.

And to tell the truth, even she didn't really know what they had. Reggie was extremely cute, that was no doubt about it. And lately, they spent most of their time together, much to Alex's dismay. Even though Maya adored all the boys in her brother's band, she couldn't deny that she felt something more about the bass player. She would never have imagined this would happen. However, Maya did everything she could to keep this feeling from becoming something more, and so far, she had been successful. At least that was what she liked to think...

That night, not even the fact that Maya was in Reggie's room prevented the boy's parents from having their usual nighttime argument.

As soon as the screams started, the teenagers were joined by Reggie's brother, Ben, that whenever I could I ran to them in search of comfort. While the adults screamed about money, bills, and other things that Maya couldn't identify, the three tried to distract themselves.

Ben joined Maya on the old sofa in Reggie's room. Maya had her notebook open drawing, as she always did. She took advantage of the fact that Reggie was distracted and was drawing him. He was, after all, her favorite model. But with Ben's arrival, she closed the notebook, already knowing what was coming next.

Ben snuggled into the girl, as he was used to doing recently, while she also fell into the routine and started stroking Ben's hair.

Reggie just looked at the scene, as usual. He tried to contain his smile, but it was in vain. He still tried to keep playing his guitar, but after a few minutes, he stopped. But that alone was enough for Ben to sleep. The warmth of the room, together with Maya's company and the soft melody that the older brother played, was what it took for the boy to finally relax and get some sleep. Not even the noise outside the room managed to bother him.

"Why did you stop?" Maya asked softly, trying not to wake Ben, who slept practically on top of her. The girl hasn't stopped stroking his hair yet

"I can't concentrate," he replied, sitting on the couch too, snuggling his brother in the middle.

"Want to tell me why?"

He shrugged. "It's nothing, I just don't know why." That was all he answered. But Reggie had two theories about his lack of focus. Either it was because of the screams, which could still be heard outside the room, or the girl. He believed strongly in the second option.

"Okay, if you want to talk, I'm here," Maya said, stopping to stroke Ben's hair, to quickly touch Reggie's shoulder.

Reggie thanked him with a smile, looking her in the eye. They stared at each other for a few seconds, until Maya looked away, blushing.

Silence reigned in the room for a few minutes, with only the fight as background noise.

"What were you drawing?" Reggie asked, looking at the closed notebook next to the girl.

Maya looked at the notebook to make sure it was closed. "Just a few ideas I had," she said, trying to make him not care.

"Have you had any feedback from the art gallery?" Reggie asked, remembering that her friend had signed up for an internship at the art gallery of her dreams.

She shook her head. "No, and I don't even think I will. I mean... What are the chances of me getting this internship?! Almost zero."

"You don't look at what you draw, do you? Your drawings are wonderful! I would never be able to do something like this... The drawings you make for the band... are something out of this world!" Reggie exclaimed excitedly, almost interrupting Ben's sleep.

"Shii," Maya signaled him to speak quietly. "And I would never be able to play the bass. So we're even." Maya replied, almost whispering, so as not to wake the boy.

"But you know how to play guitar, piano, and drums. I don't know how to play the drums." Reggie countered, imitating Maya's tone of voice.

"I know, like, the basics of playing drums, thanks to Alex. And you also know how to play the guitar and piano. And the bass and the banjo!"

"Can you accept that you are incredibly talented?" Reggie spoke, repeating something he had already said a thousand times to Maya. It wasn’t the first time that they had that kind of conversation.

Maya was tempted to shrug, but she knew that Ben probably wouldn't like that. "I already told you that I suffer from a lack of self-esteem, so no."

Reggie sighed. "One day I will make you accept how amazing you are. You can write my words down."

"I would write it down if I could move." she teased. "But seriously, relax. You don't have to worry about that."

"I think it's strange how you keep telling me to relax when you are the one who needs to relax... And Alex... Is this a family thing? Your lack of relaxation..."

"Oh, it's just family trauma. Don't let you relax. And the anxiety..."Maya scoffed. Reggie just shook his head.

"One day I'll still make you accept that you're incredibly talented," he said confidently.

"If that's what you want, that's fine. The lost time will be yours..."

Silence reigned in the room again. Maya was going to open her mouth to comment that she thought it best to put on some music, to occupy the silence, when Reggie spoke first.

"Have you thought about having a family?" he asked out of nowhere. Outside, the screams had subsided and were more and more widely spaced.

Maya looked at him without understanding where he had come from.

"I already have a family. If you look at the biological side of the thing, I have it, even if it is completely crazy and unbalanced. And if you look at the emotional side, I have it too. You and the boys... And Alex ... He's on both sides."

Reggie tried to contain his emotion and smiled. "I know. But I talk about getting married and everything else that comes with it."

The girl rolled her eyes.

"You know very well what I think of all this. And with “everything that comes with it”? Do you mean the endless fights and destruction of your personality?" she replied. It wasn't the first time that the two had spoken on this subject, and each time Maya's opinions remained the same. She didn't imagine herself getting married, having children, and everything else. Not because she doesn’t want to have children or a family. But simply out of fear. This was a feeling that was extremely familiar to her.

Reggie shrugged and ran a hand through his brother's hair, who was still sleeping peacefully clinging to Maya. "I know. But there is always a chance that you will change your mind."

Maya laughed sarcastically. "Because I really have many reasons to change my mind. "She pointed to the door, where they could still hear the residues of the fight.

He shrugged again. "It is not because our parents are always fighting, among themselves and with us, that we will end this way."

"But the chance of that happening is huge. It’s normal to repeat what you have learned at home."

"It doesn’t mean that it’s our only option."

"This type of relationship is everything we know, Reg. As much as we try not to repeat these behaviors ... unfortunately that's what will end up happening."

Reggie grimaced at the girl's statement. "I don't believe that. I think that we can have a family and be happy..." he spent a few seconds in silence. "I mean… we in general. Not we from you and me... Not that I have anything against you and me..." he started to fumble with the words, making Maya (who until then tried to keep from laughing because of the boy's nervousness) laugh openly.

"I understand, Reggie." she put a hand on his shoulder. "And yes, maybe you're right. We may not be destined to follow the path of our parents..., but that is a risk I don't want to take, not now."

Seeing his lost dog face, Maya continued: "But if there's someone who can end this cycle, it's you. I can see you in the future, with a wonderful family, full of love and care. And I admit, seeing you in that possible future, maybe I even feel like trying too..." she admitted. But she hid the part that only imagined that future if it was with him.

Reggie smiled widely. "I think you will be a wonderful mother."

Maya looked startled. "Please, we won't talk about it anytime soon. At least not for the next ten years. Thanks."

He just smiled, and pulled the girl closer to him, giving a light kiss on her forehead, and disturbing Ben's sleep, who shifted and mumbled, adjusting his position. The two only laughed but didn’t move. Neither of them wanted to end this moment.

*

Later that night, after Reggie's parents had stopped fighting and Ben had already been placed in his room, Maya and Reggie were in the kitchen, so the boy could make a snack for both of them.

"What do you want?" Reggie asked, looking into the open pantry. Maya signaled "whatever" with her hands.

"Whatever you want, I'm accepting." she reinforced. Reggie stopped for a few seconds, thinking about the options.

"Well, I know something you need to have, even if it's the middle of the night..." Reggie said, scratching his chin thoughtfully.

"And what is this?" Maya asked genuinely curious

"Coffee," he said, turning to the girl, with the coffee to make. Maya can't help but smile. "I really don't think you should have that much coffee, not with your anxiety. But I also know that there is no point in saying something about it." He started preparing their lunch.

"I'm glad you know that." Maya agreed. She watched him prepare lunch, with a half-smile, sitting on the kitchen counter. It was easy to fall into a routine with Reggie, and she was afraid of that.

After a few near misses, Reggie and Maya were finally able to eat.

"It's getting late, unfortunately, I should go home. Soon there will be no more buses." Maya said, taking the dishes, after a little discussion about who was going to wash them.

"Don't be silly. I take you home. Or you can sleep here..." Reggie suggested, feeling his face go red.

"Seriously? Like… I slept here… Won't your parents fight when they find out?" Maya asked, without looking at him, so as not to show the redness on her face.

"They don't need much to fight, they don't need reasons." Reggie pointed out. "And they already think that we date, so it doesn't make much difference," he replied, getting even redder and being imitated by the girl. Maya finally looked at him, and they stared at each other for a few seconds, until she looked away. She finished wiping the sink and turned to him.

"Won't it be weird if I sleep here?" she asked, crossing her arms and leaning on the bench.

Reggie shrugged. "I don't see why. You sleep in the bed and I sleep on the couch."

Maya rolled her eyes. "I'm not going to make you sleep on the couch, Reginald. You will wake up dead if you sleep on that sofa. If you wake up... From that couch, I don't doubt anything."

"So what do you suggest? Do you want me to take you home?" he asked without understanding.

If she could get redder than she already was, Maya would. But apparently, that was still humanly impossible. "We could share the bed if it's okay with you..."

Reggie almost choked on his saliva before speaking: "It's great!" He said in a squeaky voice. He coughed. "I mean, it’s okay. The bed is big, has space for both of us," he added, trying to hide his nervousness.

And that's how they ended up sharing a bed for the first time. Something that soon became more of a routine.

But that night, neither of them managed to relax at first. Maya is usually a person who needs to move thousands of times until she finds the right position. However, she was like a statue, afraid to make any move.

They were both lying on their backs, staring at nothing. They looked at each other when the other wasn't looking. Until they ended up looking at each other at the same time. They stared at each other for a few seconds, not knowing what to do, until they started laughing.

"I didn't think it would be like that," Maya admitted, turning to face Reggie, putting her hands under her head. Reggie soon imitated her.

"And how did you imagine it would be?" he asked.

"I don't know, I just know it wasn't like that..." the silence returned for a few more moments, while they looked at each other. "Have you thought about... us? You know, like be a... item?" Maya asked, still looking at him.

"An item?" Reggie raised an eyebrow.

"Yes… like… like a couple. I don’t know. Just forget. It's the sleep talking." and before he had time to respond, she turned the other way, putting the pillow in her face and leaving a very confused Reggie awake.

That first night, neither of them managed to sleep very well.


	4. It's Nice To Have a Friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: I really don’t know what can be considered a warning. Hm, menstruation? Some curse words. Mild threats between friends… I have no idea what I’m doing. There is nothing too heavy, I think. But if you feel that I need to put a specific warning here, please just tell me
> 
> A/N: Hey! This third part was hard work. It was already big, but I decided to add more things, and it became a snowball. So in addition to writing more stuff, it took a lot of work to proofread, and I had a tendonitis crisis halfway through. Not cool. But here it is.

**T** ime continued to pass and each day Maya and Reggie became closer. Maya sleeping at Reggie’s home has become something of the norm. In addition to being an excuse to spend less time at home, having to put up with her father, the fact that she slept at Reggie’s house also helped him, since the boy’s parents tried to cover up the fights when Maya was there. It didn’t work much, but at least with Maya in the house, Reggie (and Ben) had an excuse to stay locked inside the room, without having to witness the discussions and not being directly involved with it.

Alex didn’t like that situation in the beginning. First, because he couldn’t deny that he missed his sister a little, and second because that’s exactly what he predicted was happening, Maya and Reggie were getting closer and closer and he had already imagined where this would end. And Alex didn’t know if that was a good thing or not.

However, seeing how good it was for his sister to spend less time at home and more time with Reggie, and taking into account that things at the Mercers’ house ended up calmer with Maya spending less time there, and the conflicts ended up decreasing since the girl wasn’t there to fight back, Alex ended up accepting the situation after all, everyone ends up winning, at least for now.

That Sunday, as was already a tradition, everyone was in Bobby’s garage for another Sunset Curve rehearsal. They had started earlier that day, or as early as teenagers can start.

Maya was also present. Since she came out as a bisexual, most of her ex-friends had slowly pulled her away, each giving a different excuse. And Maya didn’t want to run after anyone who didn’t want her around. The few friends who remained with her weren’t always free, and the only one who continued to support 100% had moved to another city. Which left the girl in need of new friends. Roles that were perfectly fulfilled by the members of the Sunset Curve.

The band had welcomed her with open arms. Something that wasn’t very difficult, since she had known them for years and was already friends with everyone. It was just a natural step for her to start spending more time with them.

With the greater proximity of them, Maya also started to help more effectively with the band, becoming almost a fifth member informally. But a fifth member who definitely didn’t want to go on stage, no matter how talented she was and how much the others insisted. Maya always liked to be invisible, and she wouldn’t change that now. Instead, she helped with the outreach part, creating the artwork for the posters, as well as ideas for the band to be able to play in more places and become more popular, acting almost like an agent. And on some rare occasions, she ended up helping with compositional ideas or playing the keyboard on some music, when Reggie couldn’t get off the bass. But this is always behind the scenes.

In that rehearsal, Maya couldn’t help noticing that the band didn’t play as well as usual. They all looked a little exhausted. She blamed the situation that everyone lived at home, it wasn’t without reason that the only one who looked normal was Bobby, the only one who had a more stabilized house (it was no accident that he was the owner of the garage they used to rehearse).

Maya watched them concerned, while she scribbled some ideas she had in her faithful notebook. She wondered if it was worth talking about or if it would be promptly ignored. It was no secret that Luke was a little stubborn.

“Guys, we were terrible!” Luke said as soon as they finished playing, stomping hard when going to put the guitar on the stand.

“We weren’t that bad… ” Reggie tried to encourage, getting looks from the other members of the band. “What do you think, Maya?” he tried to get a little support.

Maya was nervous about the four boys looking at her, waiting for an answer. “Well… I don’t think you guys were terrible… ”

“I told you!” Reggie interrupted.

“But I also think you guys have played better,” Maya continued, looking directly at Reggie, for having interrupted her. The boy asked for a silent apology.

“I told you!” now Luke exclaimed, pointing at Maya. “Even Maya thinks we were terrible!”

“I didn’t say that!” Maya tried to defend herself. “Do you know what I think you need?” she closed the notebook and looked one by one.

“Money?” Bobby scoffed, trying to lighten the mood while putting away his guitar.

“Spiritual peace?” Alex came out from behind his drums and joined the rest of the group.

“A dog?” Reggie, who had already separated from his bass, sat down next to Maya, putting his arm around her shoulder. Maya tried to act as if she didn’t notice him, no matter how difficult it was.

“Don’t be terrible?” Luke threw himself dramatically in one of the armchairs, making Maya roll her eyes.

“They are all great options, but, as always, Alex is the closest to getting what I think right. You need peace, or at least relax a little.”

“Great advice, especially from you.” Alex joked, sitting on the other side of his sister on the couch,

“Look who’s talking…” she countered.

“I like this idea of relaxing.” Bobby tried to distract the siblings before they started to get into bickering with each other. He sat in the only empty armchair and put his feet on the coffee table.

“Yeah, I don’t think that would be a bad thing,” Reggie agreed.

The four started looking at Luke, waiting for his answer. Luke spent a few seconds twirling his ring on his finger, thinking about the possibilities.

“Yeah, I think we could relax a little.” he finally agreed. Shouts of celebration were heard.

“Ok… So… What are we going to do?” Alex asked when they calmed down.

The five looked at each other, with no idea.

“We could go petting a puppy?” Reggie suggested. Maya tried to hide the frown on her face.

“Yeah, it won’t happen. Maya is afraid of dogs” Bobby commented when she saw her friend’s face, and knowing that she wouldn’t have the courage to say anything.

“What?” Reggie moved away from Maya, to look at her better. The girl began to move her hands nervously. “You never told me that…” He said, confused.

Maya shrugged. “The topic never came up.”

“"The topic never came up…? But I have talked about puppies many times.”

“ But we never really get close to puppies, we just talk about them. So everything was fine… And I’m not afraid, just…”

“She just has a little fright of them,” Alex interrupted. Maya frowned at her brother.

“I didn’t know that. Do you have a particular reason?” Luke got into the conversation.

“When we were little, Maya was bitten by a dog…” Alex started.

“And even today I have the scar to prove it!” She added, showing the mark on her arm. “But I’m not afraid of puppies. It’s like… I get close, I think they’re cute and adorable, at least most of them. And I would never hurt a dog or any kind of animal. But… I don’t know; I think I ended up getting a little traumatized…” She tried to explain.

“Ah, so I don’t think I can ever have a dog,” Reggie spoke without thinking, crestfallen. Maya looked at him without understanding.

“Why not? I’m the one who is afraid, you’re free to have as many dogs as you want, Reg.”

Reggie opened his mouth, thinking of an excuse. “Hm, er… because then you won’t want to be going there to my house.” he seemed satisfied with the excuse. The other boys were relatively suspicious, but Maya didn’t seem to notice anything. But her face got hot and she didn’t know how to respond. “But I think we can have a cat then… I mean, do you like cats? ”

Maya nodded positively.

“She never had a cat,” Alex revealed, in an attempt to stop his sister from looking at his friend like a passionate fool. “In fact, we never had any animals. Our parents never allowed us.”

“Yeah,” Maya came out of her trance. “We couldn’t even have a goldfish… “It takes a lot of work”. ” Imitated the parents, making quotation marks with her hands. “It’s a fish! I think we can take care of it!” She exclaimed in disgust.

“ Calm, calm. It’s okay now.” Alex tapped his sister gently on the shoulder, trying to calm her down.

"Can we take a second to focus on Reggie saying "we can have a cat”… Or was it just that I found it strange?“ Luke got up from the armchair and sat on the side of the sofa, putting an arm around Reggie and pulling him closer. "What did you mean by “we can”?”

Reggie blushed even more. “I spoke hypothetically… You know, we can in general… Not me and Maya… We as a group.” tried to talk, stammering. The other three boys looked at each other, trying to keep from laughing, while Maya just watched, not understanding. “We can go to the beach!” He tried to get out of focus, getting up from the sofa and almost knocking Luke over.

“I think it’s an excellent idea.” Bobby had decided to be kind to his friend and help him get rid of the provocations, at least for now.

Everyone ended up agreeing with the suggestion since nobody could think of anything better. And that’s how the five ended up on the beach.

The sun was not that strong that Sunday, and since none of them (apart from Luke and his sleeveless blouses) were wearing the right clothes for the beach, it helped them.

Maya sat on a towel she had brought from Bobby’s house, to avoid getting her shorts wet, and soon started drawing while watching her friends playing ball. Or trying to play ball.

She ended up being distracted by the drawing and losing track of time.

“He likes you.” Maya raised her head scared, blurring the drawing. She looked at the newcomer who was already watching her. “And you like him.” Bobby continued.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Maya replied, trying to focus on erasing the risk she had made on the paper.

Bobby intensified his gaze. “I’ve known you for years, Maya. You can’t fool me. And Reggie doesn’t even try to hide it. You’re just too blind to notice.”

“I still don’t know what you’re talking about…”

Bobby sighed. “How long have we known each other?” there was no time for her to answer. “We grew up together. I saw you have your first crush. And the second… and so on. Do you really think you fool me?” He raised his eyebrow.

“Okay, assuming you’re right, what do you want me to do?” Maya gave up drawing and closed the notebook, staring at the boy. She knew there was no way out of that situation. Bobby knew her too well, which at the moment wasn’t a good thing for her.

“You should talk to him,” Bobby advised.

“There’s nothing to talk about, Bobby. It’s just a little crush, soon it will be over” Maya didn’t know who she was trying to convince. The boy or herself.

“You are really stubborn… And we both know that this is not just a crush, I know you and…” Bobby stopped talking when he noticed the other boys approaching. “We will continue this later.” He whispered to the girl.

“Great, now I need to avoid Bobby.” Maya thought, feeling her stomach churn. That was all she needed to complete her life.

Maya tried to focus on her friends’ conversation, but the feeling in her stomach changed. In fact, it wasn’t just in the stomach. The entire lower part of her abdomen looked like it was on fire and she felt her head heaving at the warning that a headache was coming. She knew she should be used to those symptoms by now, but that didn’t make it any easier. Maya tried to ignore the feeling that someone was putting knives in her belly, but it wasn’t working very well.

Millions of obscene words crossed her mind as she tried to do the math and see if it was that time of the month. Apparently, her period had decided to arrive by surprise, again… She should only start feeling the pain in the next few days, and not now. But it wasn’t as if her body was listening to her.

“Shit!” she spoke unintentionally, after feeling the familiar humidity in her shorts, drawing the boys’ attention.

“What happened?” Alex asked worriedly. Maya thought about how she would talk about that subject with four boys until she decided that there is no point in delaying. After all, it was something natural.

“I think I menstruated, and I didn’t bring any tampons… And probably my shorts are stained and maybe even the towel, sorry about that, Bobby,” turned to the boy in that part. “And I need you to go buy me some tampons, like, now,” she said in a single breath, feeling her eyes watering, a mixture of anger and shame. “Damn hormones!” was all that went on in her head.

The boys looked at her with their mouths slightly open, trying to understand. Alex recovered the fastest. It was not the first time that he found himself in a situation similar to that… It’s something that you get used to when you are the brother of three girls.

“It’s all right. Calm down, let’s fix it.” Alex quickly moved his faithful fanny pack. “Shit, I guess I haven’t put it back since the last time you needed it.” He closed the fanny pack and tried to remember where the nearest pharmacy was. “Okay, there’s a pharmacy nearby. I go there, buy it and you go to the bathroom and everything will be fine,” he tried to reassure his sister. “Which one do you want? The usual?”

Maya opened her mouth to answer, but Reggie was faster. “You don’t have to go to the pharmacy, Alex. ”

Everyone looked at him without understanding.

“Yes, he needs to go, Reggie. I need tampons, like, now.”

“I know.” Reggie started fumbling with his backpack. “ But I have these here.” showed the tampon he had taken out of the bag.

“ Why do you have these?” Luke asked curiously.

“There was a day that Maya menstruated there at my house and made me go out to buy a package… after that, I thought it was always better to carry some in my backpack, just in case.” Reggie blushed.

Maya felt her throat dry and was speechless. “Thank you,” she almost choked, trying to speak.

“You’re welcome,” Reggie smiled. “And I can lend you my shirt, to tie at your waist, if you want.” he pointed to the flannel blouse, which he had dropped on the towel when they went to play ball, and staying only with the tank top.

Maya nodded, picking up the shirt. “Thanks.”

Alex, Bobby, and Luke just watched the interaction, afraid to interrupt and with smiles on their faces. As much as Alex was not 100% in favor of that, it was difficult to ignore their relationship. After all, he just wanted his sister to be happy.

Reggie offered to escort Maya to the nearest public toilet and she accepted. Maya knew she was getting deeper into the black hole, but it was hard to resist.

Reggie was hard to resist.

Damn hormones.

——————————————————————————————————

It was obvious to Maya that she had already entered the black hole that she had always vowed to stay away from. But it was impossible to fight what she felt for Reggie. Despite being against the idea of having a relationship, it was not as if she could control all his feelings and impulses, however much she wanted to.

She has had some crushes and flirtations; it wasn’t like she never got involved with anyone. But I knew that what I felt for Reggie was different. And for the first time, at least on the sentimental side, she didn’t really know what to do.

The way in just a few months of friendship the boy had managed to make his way to her heart in such an easy way was incredible. And all this effortlessly on his part … at least, that’s what she thought.

But she also thought she had everything under control.

Okay, she had a (not so) little crush on her best friend. But it didn’t have to mean anything. Many people end up liking their best friend and nobody needs to know about it. And as much as Alex said that he already knew what she felt and insisted that she confess… that was just Alex being Alex. It meant nothing … Okay, Bobby was also suspicious of something. But it was Bobby. He was extremely observant and knew her really well. It was no big deal. She still had everything under control.

Everything changed when she discovered that even Luke knew about her feelings. It was there that Maya knew she had no idea of the situation she was in.

It was after the event on the beach. Luke cornered her at school, in one of the rare moments when the other boys did not accompany him.

Maya almost had a heart attack, after closing the school locker and finding Luke standing there, as if he were always there.

Luke greeted her as if he hadn’t noticed that he almost killed the girl with a heart attack.

Holding one hand to her heart, Maya exclaimed, “Good heavens, boy! Are you trying to kill me?”

He just ignored her, raising an eyebrow and speaking very suggestively. “What’s going on between you and Reggie?”

“We’re just friends?” Maya looked at him confused.

“That’s definitely not what I heard.” he provoked humming, accompanying the girl who had started walking to the cafeteria. “ And not what you show.”

“What did you hear? And I don’t show anything!” She exclaimed nervously, making Luke smile even bigger.

“Easy, easy, you don’t have to be nervous.”

“I’m not nervous!” Maya said, obviously nervous.

“Well, you are very agitated for someone who is not nervous.” was all the boy answered.

Maya stopped walking and pulled the boy into a more deserted corridor. “What do you mean by that, Patterson? What are you implying?”

Luke raised his arms as if he were defending himself, but his smile was so big it almost didn’t fit on his face. “What I mean, my dear friend is that you are completely in love with our dear Reginald.”

She stopped for a second trying to process what the boy had said. “Who told you that? Was it Alex? Bobby? Because you need to know that they are crazy! They’re crazy!”

“Nop,” he said, shaking his head. “It was you” Maya stared at him without understanding. “Oh, come on, Maya. It’s pretty obvious, really. Reggie just hasn’t noticed yet because, well, it’s Reggie …, but it would be very difficult for your best friend not to notice when you’re liking someone.”

“You never noticed when I like someone,” she said. “You can’t even notice when people like you, Luke. You are a terrible observer for everything that doesn’t involve music.”

“That’s right. For you to see how obvious you are being!”

Sighing, Maya asked sheepishly, “Is it that obvious?”

“Very!” Luke exclaimed happily because the girl finally admitted what she felt. “As I said, Reggie just didn’t notice because it’s Reggie.”

“Great, keep it that way!” she replied angrily.

“Great? Nothing great! You need to talk to him!” the boy countered.

“ Are you crazy too? I won’t say anything to him!” Maya almost snarled.

“ Yes, you will talk to him! ” Luke insisted.

“No, I will not!”

“Yes, you will!”

“I will not! And don’t get involved, because if you do, I’ll make you pay!” Maya threatened, approaching him.

“Sorry, I feel threatened by a cupcake” commented seeing the girl approaching.

“I’m going to show you the cupcake, Patterson.” She grabbed his shirt, but before Maya could carry out the threat, which she didn’t even know how she would do, they were interrupted by the arrival of Reggie, who looked at them without understanding what was going on.

“Sorry, I didn’t know it was going to interrupt you two,” he said, sounding disheartened. “It’s just that the boys asked me to find you two,” he explained, without looking at them.

“Okay …” Maya started to say, moving away from Luke. She wanted to explain that Reggie was not interrupting anything, but she didn’t have time.

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Reggie cut her off and went back where he had come from. And as soon as he arrived, he was gone.

Maya looked at Luke without understanding. “What was this?”

“I have no idea,” was the boy’s reply. 

She faced the path Reggie had taken, trying to understand what had gone through his head for leaving like that. “ I think… no, it can’t be.

Luke looked at her confused. "What?”

“I think…, I think he thought we, like… you know…” and looked at him suggestively. Luke did not understand at first.

“What?” He asked again.

“He must have thought we were like, making out… or about to… I don’t know.”

Luke made a face again. “What?” repeated for the third time. “Disgusting!” Exclaimed when he finally understood.

“Wow, thank you. Great way to make a girl feel wanted.” Maya quipped, heading back to the cafeteria. Luke followed.

“ I adore you, too much! You’re like my little sister. It’s disgusting.”

“Thanks for the part that touches me, but yeah, you’re not the boy of my dreams either, Patterson.”

“Of course not, it’s Reggie.”

Pointing a finger at him, Maya said: “First of all, no jokes and comments about it. And second, congratulations, thanks to you and your little outbreak, Reggie now thinks I have something with you.”

“And why do you care about that?”

“I don’t care,” she said, clearly caring. Seeing it wouldn’t stick, she added: “I mean, he looks like he was upset. Because of you, I must remember! And he’s my friend, so of course, I’m worried.”

Luke smiled. “Of course that’s just why.” Ironized. “Don’t worry, I’ll talk to him.”

“Don’t get involved, Patterson.” But it was too late, Luke had run out to the cafeteria, leaving Maya alone.

Alone and completely destroyed. The only thing that clung to was the fact that Reggie was a little slow, and at least from him, she would be able to hide her feelings.

Or not…

Good heavens, she was completely screwed.

—————————————————————————————————— 

Maya, after the disastrous conversation with Luke, spent the next few days without going to the band’s rehearsal and trying to maintain a relative distance from the group. She knew that the chance that any of the idiots she called a friend would reveal something to the idiot she was in love with was too big. And even if they didn’t, Maya wasn’t mentally prepared to deal with the provocations she knew would happen.

Maya swore she still tried to spend time alone with Reggie, but she felt there was something different. She just didn’t know what it was, and it was slowly driving her crazy. So she did what she did best, and walked away a little.

That night she had decided to stay home. It was one of the rare nights where there was still no fight in the Mercer family. This was only because her parents had gone out to dinner, leaving her alone with Alex, in the most perfect peace.

Maya had had a creative spurt and so she decided to stay in her room drawing and writing. She didn’t know when that would happen again.

After scribbling one more idea, she began to analyze her notebook and soon noticed a pattern. It was the missing piece, finally, something in her head clicked and she left desperately for Alex’s room, notebook in hand.

Opened the door violently, without knocking, and almost knocked her brother off the bed with a start. Without stopping, Maya almost threw the notebook at him.

“Look at this!” pointed to the notebook, as she started pacing the room.

Alex started to flip through the notebook, scared, not knowing what he was looking for. “What exactly should I look for here? Ah, I see…” he said when he passed half of the notebook, noticing the repetition of the model. “You have a problem…”

“I know!” Maya almost screamed, throwing herself back on the bed.

“But I already knew that. So what’s the problem?”

“The problem is that more than half of my drawings are Reggie… or him, or something that reminds me of him… What do I do, Alex?” She looked at her brother for comfort.

“Well, you should talk to him and admit what you feel.” advised, closing the notebook.

“Admit what I feel? But I don’t even know what I feel!” Maya whimpered.

“You are clearly in love with him.”

“I thought it was just a crush, that would pass with time… But time goes by and it only increases. How can I say this to him?!” Maya sat on the bed, facing her brother.

“With words…” if looks could kill, the look Maya gave Alex would have killed him. “Now seriously, you need to talk to him. Especially now, after you practically disappeared this week… ”

“I was busy this week” seeing her brother’s eyes, she reinforced. “Seriously… I got a call from the art gallery” she revealed. “They want more samples of my work, so I spent the week trying to come up with new ideas. That’s why I disappeared… right, it wasn’t just that, but it was one of the reasons. ”

“Why didn’t you tell me before?” Alex asked, sounding offended. Maya rolled her eyes.

“I didn’t tell anyone. Afraid to go wrong and then having to explain that it went wrong … I’m afraid of going wrong and then having to explain that it went wrong … I haven’t even delivered the drawings yet, and honestly, I don’t think this internship will happen.”

“You need more confidence.”

“Look who’s talking!” Maya replied.

“Stop using me as an example!” Alex ordered.

“You, as you love to remind me, are my older brother. The younger siblings are inspired by older ones.” she scoffed. Now it was Alex’s turn to roll his eyes.

“ I think it’s great that I’m only older when you’re interested… And we have two other sisters, with no apparent psychological problem. Get inspired by them!”

“I can do nothing if I’m closer to you.” Maya shrugged. 

Alex sighed.

“Getting back to the original topic… You need to talk to Reggie, but first, you need to admit to yourself what you feel.”

Maya held back the urge to try to change the subject. She bit down on the inside of her cheek, trying to think.

“So?” Alex encouraged her.

“I think… I’m completely and totally in love with Reggie.” Maya finally admitted, covering her face with a pillow and screaming.

“Calm, calm.” patted her sister’s shoulder. “You see, it wasn’t even that bad.”

“ It wasn’t even that bad?! I’m in love with my best friend, Alex! Do you have any idea how screwed I am?” Maya jumped up from the bed, walking back and forth.

“Is that how boys feel when I start walking?” Alex murmured to himself. “I thought Luke was your best friend, after me, of course.”

“A person can have more than a best friend.”

“Touché. And I understand how difficult it is to fall in love with your best friend… But you need to talk to Reggie and admit your feelings.”

“Did you admit yours?”

“You know that in my case it is different…”

“I see no difference,” Maya countered, returning to sit on the mattress.

“Can you stop straying from the v?! The focus here is on you. You may have only admitted your feelings now, but you spent most of the week avoiding Reggie, and he noticed.”

“I was avoiding everyone!” tried to defend herself.

“Now I know that. But the others don’t. Reggie doesn’t… you need to talk to him.” Alex reinforced.

“I’m screwed,” she said, lying on the bed and closing her eyes.

“No more than normal.” Alex tried to cheer her up. It didn’t work out very well.

“I’m scared, Alex.” Maya finally admitted, her voice breaking. Alex pulled her into a hug.

“I know… but everything will be fine.” Maya sank into the embrace, trying to gain strength.

“Do you really believe that?” looked at him.

“No… but even if it doesn’t, I’ll be by your side” he comforted her, tightening his embrace.

The twins spent the rest of the night together, giving each other comfort.

The next morning, Maya finally told the boys about the phone call from the art gallery, blaming her disappearance because of that. She just didn’t have the courage to reveal her feelings to Reggie… Despite this, the mood between the two almost returned to normal. And Maya was deeply grateful for that. She no longer knew how to live without Reggie at her side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think of the story. Thanks!


	5. Willow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Panic/anxiety attack, swearing, people who don’t understand their feelings, mentions bad handwriting. Please, if you think I need to add something, tell me, please

**O** ne more night.

One more fight.

Reggie and Maya stayed in the garage until late, neither wanted to be at home that night. Alex had been back home for some time, but the sister decided to stay a little longer with their friend.

A friend who now insisted on leaving her at home, as usual.

They were approaching the Mercer’s house when Reggie stopped the car halfway and looked at Maya as if he had a brilliant idea.

Maya looked at him, not understanding why he had stopped and looked at her like that. "Reggie? Why do we stop?"

"I had an idea. Do you trust me?" He asked, extending a hand to take hers.

She looked at him fearfully but took his hand. "Not?" Reggie looked upset. Sighing, Maya corrected herself. "A little. Think..."

"You will not regret it!" He exclaimed excitedly, giving a kiss on the cheek of the girl, who blushed. "Er..." Reggie flushed, and to disguise, started the car again, turning around and going to the new destination.

Maya looked at the window without understanding. "Why did you bring me to the beach at two o'clock on a Thursday morning?” She asked when Reggie turned off the car.

Reggie shrugged. "It seemed like a good idea." He got out of the car and ran to open the door for Maya, who was still trying to process what was going on. Reggie helped her out of the car and guided her to the edge of the sea, where he sat.

The girl stared at him for a few seconds while he looked at the sea. "Okay, can we go now?" she asked.

"Are you really going to stand there?" He asked, ignoring her.

"Reggie. It's two in the morning. Tomorrow we have school. And my dad will kill me if he finds out I was out so late..." Reggie looked at her as if asking “so what?”. "Okay, not that I care much about it. But it's cold! And the sand is wet."

"Here," he handed her his famous leather jacket, of which he was extremely jealous. Just because of that gesture, Maya took the courage to sit next to him. "Better?" Asked when the girl put on the jacket.

"Yes, thank you," Maya tried not to smell the jacket, which smelled like Reggie. She doesn't have to fall into the hole anymore. "But I still don't understand why we're here. What is the reason?!" 

Sighing, Reggie said, "You need to loosen up more, Maya. Doing some things just for doing, without thinking too much before" tried to encourage her.

"I'm already bisexual in a world where half the population doesn't even know what it is, Reg. I don't think I need to loosen up more," Maya snapped, rolling her eyes.

"It wasn't something you chose, so it doesn't count. It's not like you have any choice but be who you are..." Maya looked at him in awe. "What? Is there something on my face?" He asked worriedly, running his hands over his face.

Maya just shook her head, laughing. "No, you silly. It's just that I didn't expect you to philosophize like that."

"What can I say? I'm full of surprises!" He gave a seductive smile, running a hand through his hair. "I'm not just a pretty body."

Maya wanted to admit that it affected her, in a way that it shouldn't. But all she did was take a handful of sand and throw it at him.

"Hey! It was not cool!" Reggie complained, trying to clean himself up.

"I am also full of surprises," was the girl's reply, shrugging her shoulders. Reggie pushed the girl's shoulder lightly in response.

They spent a few seconds in silence, just watching the sea. Until Reggie, without looking away from the sea, wrapped his arm around Maya, bringing her closer to him. She looked at him, trying to understand what was going on.

"Seriously, Reggie. As much as I love being with you, it's two in the morning. And we are on a deserted beach. Why did you bring me here? Not that I'm finding it unpleasant... But why?"

"The sea helps to calm me down. It helps to put everything into perspective."

"And what do you need to put in perspective at two in the morning, that you can't wait until normal hours?... Reggie?" Insisted after he did not answer for a few seconds.

Reggie buried his head on the girl's shoulder as if hoping she wouldn't hear him. "I don't want to be your friend..." Maya felt like she had been punched in the stomach.

"Okay...," she said, turning away from him, who stared at her without understanding. "But you didn't have to bring me to the beach to say that, Reggie. The ride home will be really uncomfortable," he still looked at her without comprehension. "I mean..."

"What are you trying to say?" Reggie asked, genuinely confused. Maya wasn't understanding anything anymore.

"You said you don't want to be my friend anymore..." she recalled.

"Yes..." he confirmed, not realizing where she was going.

"And it will make things uncomfortable?" Maya insisted.

"Will make it?" Reggie asked dejectedly, looking like a stray dog.

"Yeah, since you know, you don't want to be my friend anymore."

They spent some time staring at each other, trying to understand what the other meant. Maya sighed, seeing that she would have to explain in detail to the boy.

"Reggie, you said you don't want to be my friend. So, we will not be friends. So, we will no longer be close, and so, the return home will be strange. Unless you plan on leaving me on this beach. Which would be a motherfucker move on your part."

Reggie took a second to process what she meant, practically freaking out when he understood. He jumped up, exclaiming: "No, no! Heavens, not Maya. I want to be your friend... no, I don't want to be your friend, but it's not that I don't like you... " and stopped talking.

Maya also stood up, already irritated by the constant roller coaster of emotions. "What do you want, Reggie?" She asked, stopping in front of him.

The boy felt that he was drowning in her eyes, and without thinking, said: "I want to kiss you."

She took a step back, confused. "What?" Stammered.

Gathering up the courage he didn't know where it came from, Reggie spoke again. "I like you, Maya. For a very long time, like, always."

"What?" She repeated shocked. Maya didn't believe if this was real, or if she had finally gone crazy. Reggie didn't take his eyes off the girl; she was all he could see.

"I even think I'm in love with you... No, I'm sure I'm in love with you. But we were never friends, and then we became friends," he was gesturing madly. "And then I saw you with Luke, and I was jealous, and he told me that there was nothing between you two, but that I should talk about how I feel. And that's all I can think of since then. But apparently, I screwed up, as I always do, and..."

What he was going to keep saying, Maya never knew, because at that moment she decided to follow his advice, and do something without thinking.

It was not the first kiss of either. But if you asked them at that moment, they said it was the best they had.

"I'm sorry, I should have asked if I could have kissed you..." Maya said as soon as they separated. Reggie looked at her like she was crazy.

"That kiss was all I wanted, Maya. Can I kiss you again?" he asked. The girl agrees, smiling.

They spent the rest of the night enjoying the new side of friendship. They only stopped when they were wet by the sea, which was filling up, which they didn't even notice until it was too late.

* * *

"What are you doing?" Alex asked Maya when the kitchen was finally empty. He had spent all breakfast watching the girl write in her faithful notebook.

Maya looked at him, startled as if she were being caught doing something wrong. "Nothing," she said quickly, trying to close the notebook. But Alex was faster and took from her hand. The girl sighed, without trying to fight.

_“This feeling's so alien_

_Need to know if you're just a friend_

_Are you a secret I'm holdin' in?_

_So leave it on my brain if you feel the same_

_…_

_I'm overthinking my thoughts again_

_No we don't break, but we're bound to bend_

_Getting in my space, livin' in my place_ _"_

Alex reads it aloud. "It doesn't look like anything"

"It's just an idea I had," she said, taking the notebook back and closing it.

"This is really good, Maya. You should show Luke, maybe it could turn into a song for the band."

"No" Maya shook her head for emphasis. "Not the style of the band," she said firmly.

Alex raised an eyebrow. "Okaay. If you say... And why do I get the impression that this is about last night "

"I don't know what you're talking about?" Maya tried to pretend ignorance, putting the notebook in the backpack and closing it.

"Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about," he rolled his eyes as he spoke. "I saw you arriving at dawn, all wet and with a silly smile on your face", Maya looked away from her brother, feeling her face heat up. "So what happened? Were you with Reggie? "

"Yes. I'm not sure what happened..."

"How are you not sure?!"

"It was all very confusing and..." Maya was cut off by the sound of the horn. She jumped up, picking up her backpack, and heading for the door.

"Is this all in a hurry to meet Reggie?" Alex spoke, making Maya stop with her hand on the doorknob.

"Oh gosh, it's Reggie!"

"It's always Reggie... since he got his driver's license, is he always giving us a ride?" Alex remembered it as if it was obvious, and it was. Reggie was the one who lived the furthest away, so he ended up offering to pick up friends at home for school. The only one who did not participate in this was Bobby, since he had his car and lived in the other direction.

Maya let go of the handle and looked at her brother with wide eyes. "I don't know…"

"Don't you know what?"

"I don't know what it will be like... after last night... I'm not ready to find Reggie" she replied desperately.

"Okay, what happened last night?" Alex asked in exasperation. Maya blushed at her brother's gaze.

"We may or may not have kissed..." Maya replied and put a curl of hair behind her ear.

Alex looked at her as he thought about what he would say, but he didn't have time, as they soon heard the doorbell ring. Alex abruptly opened the door.

"Did you kiss my sister?" he asked, looking at his friend.

Reggie looked at the brothers without understanding. "Hi?" tried to greet them.

"Did you kiss my sister?" Alex repeated.

"Yes? Well, theoretically she kissed me first, and…" Reggie started to answer. Alex sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"You two need to resolve this situation," he said and left the house, heading for the car.

Maya and Reggie stood in the same place, not knowing what to do.

"HI," Reggie repeated to the girl.

"Hi"

"Do you want to talk about yesterday?" the boy asked.

"She wants to, but not now, now we have school" Alex interrupted them both, and started pulling his friend. "You guys resolve this later."

Reggie let himself be pulled but turned his head to watch the girl, who laughed softly, as she closed the house.

Normally the drive from the Mercers' house to Luke's house was full of conversation, but this time the car was in an abnormal silence, with only Alex muttering under his breath in the back seat of the car. Reggie, when the car stopped at a traffic light, made a point of holding Maya's hand and looking at the girl, trying to give her a little comfort. Maya returned with a small smile and squeezing his hand.

When Luke got in the car he started talking normally, until he noticed that something was strange.

"What happened?"

"Reggie and Maya kissed, now they don't know how to act", Alex replied, followed by a slight protest from Maya, who turned on the seat to take a quick look at her brother. "You know I'm right," Alex snapped. Maya thought it best not to answer and returned to her original position.

"Oh man, couldn't you wait another day?! I was so close to winning the bet with Bobby" Luke signaled with his fingers how close he was.

"Did you really bet on my love life?" Maya asked without believing. "You don't have anything else to do?"

"I have, so much so, that I did not participate in this madness," Alex said.

"Did you know that?" Maya sounded offended.

"Of course I knew. I think it's incredible that you two don't know. These two idiots were not very discreet."

Maya looked at Reggie, asking without words if he knew it. The boy shook his head, and Maya sighed with relief. At least she wasn't the only one not to notice.

"Can you tell Bobby only tomorrow?" Luke insisted, putting his face in the middle of the front seats.

Maya rolled her eyes. "Reggie and I haven't even talked properly yet, Patterson. Calm down".

"Yeah, Luke. And you have to accept that you lost." Reggie scoffed at his friend, sending him a smile through the rearview mirror.

Luke frowned and leaned against his bench. "I am happy for what is going on between you two, but you're costing me five dollars," he complained.

"That's what happens when you bet on your friends' lives", Maya retaliated.

* * *

After arriving at the school each went their way and Maya and Reggie hardly met. This only served to make the girl more apprehensive.

She knew she needed to speak to Reggie. And she knew she shouldn't feel nervous like that. After all, Reggie was her best friend, and he had already made it very clear that he felt the same way. But one thing is that your consciousness is aware of all this, another thing is what is going on in your unconscious.

In the few moments that they met at the school, Reggie acted normally, as if nothing had happened. Maya also tried to imitate this normality, but it was obvious to everyone that she was failing. The looks that her friends sent her made that very clear. Even Bobby, who was not part of the conversation in the car, knew what was going on. Unfortunately for Luke, who lost his five dollars.

When she finally got rid of the school, Maya ran to meet the others in the parking lot. But when she got there, she only found Reggie leaning against the side of his car.

"Where are the boys?" she asked, noting the absence of Bobby's car, which had been next to Reggie's.

"They've already gone to Bobby's, to rehearse," Reggie replied, moving toward her. "I thought we could go for a walk before going there? That is if it's okay with you." his voice was full of apprehension.

Maya just nodded, and Reggie opened the car door for her. "Thank you", she thanked him, sitting in the car. The boy closed the door and went to his side.

"Where are we going?" Maya asked after a few minutes of silence.

"Ah yes. I thought about going to that bakery shop you like, what do you think? "

"Yes, it can be…"

Reggie smiled at her. "And there we can talk about yesterday… if you want"

Maya nodded again, not daring to say anything.

She didn't know why she felt so nervous, so anxious. The hardest part was over. She knew that Reggie liked her, and she liked him... so why was her mind so fast? Thousands of possibilities crossed her mind. Maybe last night she got it all wrong... maybe he had changed his mind and didn't know how to say it... and maybe, even if they were together for good, she would end up screwing up, as she always did...

Maya started to feel like the car was getting smaller. She felt her heart beating wildly and her breathing becoming uneven. She closed her eyes, trying to get back to normal. Ran her hands over her pants, trying to dry them.

The air was getting thinner and thinner, and her chest was aching.

"Maya?" She could hear Reggie calling her worried.

"Stop the car, please" Maya managed to speak, already putting her hand on the car door handle.

"What's it?" he asked without understanding.

"STOP THE CAR" Maya screamed without thinking, and soon felt the car slow down. The girl struggled to get free of the belt, being helped by Reggie, and jumped out of the car, kneeling on the asphalt.

The pain in her chest had spread throughout her body, and she was fighting the urge to vomit.

Some part of her noticed Reggie beside her, but the feeling that she was drowning in herself was stronger than anything else. She was going to die, here and now. Her heart was going to explode, she was sure of it. Or it would be the shortness of breath that would kill her.

Maya felt the world getting darker and darker as if she were seeing through a veil.

"Hey, hey", Reggie put her hands on the girl's shoulders. "It's okay, I'm here" tried to comfort her, but Maya was still in the same state. "Okay, okay, okay… think Reggie… I know. Alex says it's good to be distracted during these crises, so I'm going to try to distract you, okay?”

Maya tried to agree but didn't know if it worked. Still, Reggie started to speak.

"Did you know that Alex didn't want to introduce me to you? All because I said you were really pretty after the first time, I saw you walking down the hall…" this caught Maya's attention, and she tried to focus on Reggie's voice. "He was afraid that I wanted to have something with you... too bad for him, because I didn't even need to know you right to fall in love" if Maya was paying attention, she would notice the redness on the boy's face. Reggie cleared his throat before continuing. "Do you want to try to breathe with me? Alex said it helps, too." Maya managed to nod this time, and Reggie guided one of the girl's hands to his chest and started counting.

Maya lost track of how long they stayed there, but slowly the world came back into focus, and she was able to breathe easier.

"Thank you" spoke in a weak voice. Reggie smiled, brushing the hair out of her face.

"You want to go home?" he asked. Maya denied it.

"No... only if you don't want to go out with me anymore..." she replied apprehensively, thinking that maybe she had finally scared him.

"No, I want to be with you", Reggie stood up and held out his hand to her, who accepted it gratefully. Only now did the girl notice that they were on a sidewalk, with the car parked beside them.

Reggie guided her to the car and returned to her side. "Do you still want to go to the bakery shop?"

"Yes, please"

The boy took Maya's hand, giving it a light kiss. "Okay, we are already close".

They followed the rest of the trip in silence, with only the noise coming from the radio.

"Are you alright?" Reggie asked after they placed the order at the counter and sat down.

"Yes, now yes. Thank you… you know, for everything" Maya thanked him, looking at her lap, not daring to look at the boy.

"Whenever you need me, I'm here," Reggie assured her, extending his hand across the table. Maya took a second before imitating him, letting their hands meet halfway. "You really worried me… you were out of breath, and your pupil was huge! I didn't know the pupil could stay that size in the middle of the day! "

Maya laughed, trying to hide her nervousness. "I understand if you don't want to have anything else with me, you know, after that," she said, watching her hands intertwined. Reggie stopped stroking her hand and looked at her in alarm.

"You don't want to have anything with me?"

"No, no... I mean, yes, I want to have something with you... But that's what you're getting yourself into, Reggie. I don't know how to deal with emotions." She let go of his hand. "Literally, my body doesn't know how to process emotions", she pointed to herself with both hands.

"I didn't lie, Maya. I've been interested in you since the first day. And when we finally became friends, everything got stronger… you need more than that to get me away, in case you didn't want me to get away" he guaranteed, reaching for her hand again.

Maya seemed to think for a moment, before putting her hand on the table again. "So what does that mean? What are we?" The insecurity was clear in the girl's voice.

"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

Before Maya had time to answer, the waitress came back with their snacks. The two were silent as the woman set the dishes on the table.

"Thank you," they said before she left.

Reggie returned to focus on Maya. "I understand you don't want to and ..."

"I accept. I want to. There is nothing more I want than that," Maya stated, making Reggie smile and get up from the table to kiss her.

* * *

That conversation was not the first step in their relationship, but it had definitely changed everything.

After they finished eating, the two agreed that it wouldn't hurt if they missed a rehearsal and went to Reggie's house, where they called the boys and told them they weren't going. Luke only slightly protested the absence of them at rehearsal.

After that day, the group's dynamics changed slightly, with Alex trying to keep the urge to roll his eyes every time he saw them together. Which they were often. Luke, after he finally got over his sadness at losing five dollars, looked like a dog he had discovered had been adopted. And Bobby found the way it all happened extremely hilarious.

"You can count on Reggie to try to win a girl like that..." Bobby commented when, the next day, they told the story of the night on the beach.

They were in the garage, about to start the rehearsal. That was interrupted because the group wanted to understand how things happened between the two.

"Really. “I do not want to be your friend". Who starts a declaration of love like that?" Luke agreed, picking up his guitar.

"Apparently Reggie. And apparently, my sister likes that kind of thing. I expected more from you, Maya." teased Alex, going behind the drums, and the very mature response of the girl was to give the tongue.

"This is all envy because I got the girl and you guys don’t," Reggie said, still sitting on the couch, with Maya in his arms.

"It is, of course, Reginald. I'm jealous of you" Alex quipped. Reggie also responded very maturely and gave the tongue.

"But really, baby. You need to work on your pick up lines," Maya agreed with the boys, looking at Reggie.

"You are the only person I want to date. And it worked for you. So that's enough for me."

Maya blushed at what the now boyfriend said. After kissing his cheek, she said: "Okay, that was cute, I admit. You don't have to work on pick up lines, they are already great."

Reggie was going to kiss her when they heard Alex hitting the drums, which scared them.

"No kisses in front of me, and that's an order!" Alex said, trying to be serious.

Maya and Reggie looked at him and then looked at each other, shrugging, kissing, making the blonde grumble.

The boys let this go on for a while until the three came together to separate the couple. "I fully support your relationship, but now we need to rehearse," Luke said, pulling Reggie away from Maya. The boy made a sad face, staring at his girlfriend, who was just laughing, being held by her brother.

"Okay, okay. I promise to try not to disturb you," Maya said, raising her hands as if she were surrendering.

"Great, because I will need your help on this song that I thought of," Luke replied excitedly, leaving the bassist aside, and approaching his friend, with the lyrics in his hand. "Reggie helped me add the keyboard because I think it will match. But as he will be playing the bass, I need you to take over that part," he showed the paper to Maya, who took it, trying to decipher his lyrics.

"First of all, taking some calligraphy classes never hurt anyone. And second, you can leave it to me," Maya said, addressing the keyboard.

"Hey! My handwriting is not that bad!" Luke exclaimed indignantly.

"No, for your handwriting to be bad, it would need to be much better," Bobby countered, picking up his guitar.

"Yeah, I don't know how teachers can understand that," agreed Alex.

"I still don't understand it," Reggie admitted.

Luke still tried to disagree but was promptly silenced by his teammates.


End file.
